You Before Me (I’m Not Mad, Just Broken)

Phil Kaye taught me that
if you repeat something enough,
it loses its meaning.

I have spent so much time
trying to give purpose to your life
that I have lost my own.

I do not know how to tell you
that I am a hypocrite.

I spend so many hours
coaxing the safety back on your gun,
with a finger on my own trigger.

I convince you to live
while planning my death.

I hold hands with my demons
while breaking down yours.

I do not know how to ask for help
because you always request it first.


Check out my book, The Four Stages of Poetry, now available on amazon.

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8 thoughts on “You Before Me (I’m Not Mad, Just Broken)

  1. I like this poem, yet it has some very dark themes. I’m not sure how else to say it, but, are you experiencing suicidal thoughts sometimes? I’m not trying to be rude or anything, it’s just that most authors’ poems reflect how they are in real life.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is beautiful, its so true, people tend to deal with other peoples problems before their own, I’m sorry you experience that. Whoever you’re helping, their health is important too, but don’t ever forget about you and how you’re doing. Talk anytime, you don’t even have to say anything and I dont even have to respond if youd like, , just rant, yell, type in caps, idc, talk whenever. Seriously, its ok to ask for help. Ik it’s hard to ask and you may not want to, but you might regret it one day. Anytime, srsly ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Actually, your opinion means a lot to me! Thank you so much, I really appreciate it. If you do, thank you, thank you, and I hope you enjoy it. Never hesitate to comment or reach out for any questions, comments, concerns, etc. etc. My metaphorical door is always open.

      Liked by 1 person

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